When the Special Days Don’t Feel Special

Some days are circled on the calendar with hope. Birthdays. Anniversaries. Milestones. Days that are supposed to shimmer with meaning. You wake up thinking, Maybe today will feel different. Maybe someone will make a fuss. Maybe I’ll finally feel seen.

And then… it doesn’t happen.

The text doesn’t come. The celebration feels forced. The moment passes quietly. And you’re left wondering: Do I even matter?

It hurts. Because deep down, we all crave proof. Proof that we’re cherished. That we’re irreplaceable. That someone sees us and thinks, I’m so glad you exist.

But here’s the truth: not feeling special doesn’t mean you aren’t.

Your worth isn’t measured by how loudly others celebrate you. It’s not in the number of messages, the size of the cake, or the sparkle of the moment. Your worth is in the quiet resilience you carry. In the way you keep showing up, even when it’s hard. In the love you give, even when it’s not returned in the way you hoped.

This isn’t a toxic pep talk. I’m not here to tell you to “just be grateful” or “look on the bright side.” The ache is real. The disappointment is valid. But so is this: you are still special, even when no one claps.

So what do you do when the day feels hollow?

Start here: today’s 10-second miracle.Pause. Breathe. Place your hand over your heart. And say to yourself, “I matter. Even if no one said it today. I matter.”

It’s a small act, but it’s powerful. Because it’s you, choosing to witness yourself. To honour your own existence. To not wait for the world to validate what’s already true.

If today feels heavy, you’re not alone. And if you need support navigating these quiet hurts, I’m here. Therapy isn’t just for the big traumas — it’s also for the small heartbreaks that accumulate when we feel unseen.

You deserve to feel held. Not just on the big days, but on the ordinary ones too.

Author Yasmin Williams